critical thinking

Okay, so last week I visited University of Tennessee. UT's program is like any other Educational Interpreting program. It is mainstreamed and focused on kids. The area where you study made me want to cry. OMG the asl lab is a closet! of course >.> the classroom was the size of Wood's ASL Lab before the recent expansion...which that is okay. Don't think UT considers investing in interpreting, though it is one of the most needed positions in the state. Odd, isn't it?

I've been gabbing on and on about going to knoxville if i get accepted. Its not cause I am excited, but I am trying to convince myself it is okay to do this. I feel like I'm settling, but there are so few schools that offer what i want. Most of them are like UT. Off hand I would say CSUN, NTID, and Gally have awesome programs. UNCG and Woods are one step below those. NTID and Gallaudet offer classes you cannot get just anywhere for those interested in Deaf studies. CSUN has some of those classes, but not all of them. They are pretty damn close. UNCG and Woods have a Deaf-centered attitude. UNCG is the same program as woods, but half the price ;) Oh and you have more options for concentrations. Programs like UT are conscience of Deaf, issues, history, etc; but, they cannot get further into them because of funding or some other reason. Educational Interpreting focuses on the mainstream. It gives no reason to have a class on Deaf culture, Deaf lit, or Deaf history. You will be working in a school environment, and you don't need to know much more. It is a VERY important job, but most interpreters take on other jobs too when they aren't working. I don't know. I'm quite odd.

I have to convince myself, because I want to finish my education. I can't be running around for the next two years, like I have been since fall of 09. I'm scared of not getting the education I know I could get. Many people think I sound silly, but I learned a lot at Woods about what I wanted to be as an interpreter and the education I want. Its hard to adjust to the changes. I also want to take the chance to get some sort of Deaf studies in my education while I can. Its easier when you have financial aid. I love learning about Deaf society and history. I also want to be a conscience interpreter. I care about those I work with. So much has already been done in our ignorance as hearing to oppress Deaf in the past. I'm afraid of going into a program that does not understand this.

I guess maybe its good that I know what I want and am aware. I plan on if i have to settle then I can make up for it later when I'm done. THere are things I learned at Woods about my education, ad a lot of it depends on me...especially fluency.

UT freaks me out about my education, but I need to get this over with. I can find assistance in the future for what else I want in my education. Gally offers a Deaf studies major as a graduates adn NTID has a certificate that will allow me to take the classes for my own reasons. You never know what the future holds.

Benji

Last night, I thought about something to myself. I was in south carolina for a day filled of events. One event was my 10 year high school reunion. The event was not too big of a deal for me. I was curious and wanted to go. (Honestly, acted more stupid than I chatted with others...but hard to talk with loud music. I have bad issues with background noise. I always have)

But as I thought, I realized the one friend I have kept since high school is the one I never thought I would keep, Ben Slayton, aka benji. Just to clarify, I give all my friends nick names, and that is the one I gave him long ago. Ben was the awkward kid when I was in high school. First day of Cooke's class, Ben stated he loved ford explorers and firestone tires....a week after the recall of those exact things. He was an okay kid, to me. I chatted with him, especially since he knew my friends that had left high school the year before. I never purposely sought friendship with him. He did seem odd.

Over the years, situations caused me to get to know Ben more. While I lost friends through distrust, betrayal, and various other situations; Ben was still there as a great friend I could hang around with. He's not on the level of say someone I deeply confide in, but he is still a good friend I like to hang out with when I'm in SC. I kind of got to know him more over the years. I started to understand that Ben works in his own ways. He may seem odd at times, but that is the spice of life and what makes him fun. We're all interesting and unique in our own ways. Ben has never been truly awkward or someone to cause me trouble. I encourage him in being silly cause its fun. Life is not all about being serious. We need to relax and have fun at times. I try as much as possible...though its hard with being in school now...just loaded on school work. This semester is all about being perfect on paper >.> eve though i'm a C average student.

So here's to Benji! May you live well and your dreams come true. Remember that they will one day :D Til then, be the awesomeness that is you!

Time to decide

So I took a long walk today to get to Silent Bucs. Mom was at an interview, and I wanted to go to the Silent Bucs Deaf Awareness Week event for today at ETSU. I walked from the post office down to ETSU. Probably a thirty min walk or so for me. I got to ETSU. I was sorta scared. Didn't know these kids. The people I knew had graduated. I bought a candle to support Silent Bucs then sat around since I told mom I'd meet her at ETSU. I chatted with the interpreter until I was somewhat comfortable. The interpreter left for a bit then hearing people came up. What I have been taught from Woods about whats rude and not kicked in. Looked awkward as hell with the fact i was not completely comfortable with myself. Probably confused one hearing kid and the nice kid behind the desk cause i was, out of bad habit, signing my side of the conversation. I am losing my ability to sign so i was sorta limited in helping. A nice kid came up. He wanted to learn more then didn't know that interpreting was a job. Been there, so been there! XD Omg he tried to buy my asl book off me. I was like "nuuuuuuuuuu". It was nice and fun while I waited for mom.

During the walk and my time out, I kept thinking about my list of colleges I had to remake since I dropped my computer, had to recover the hard drive, new hard drive died, then had to get another hard drive to replace it. Oh yes! It was tons of fun. People always mention UT to me, and I always say no because they have no Deaf culture classes what so ever. How can you work with Deaf and not have understanding of Deaf culture ? Yah know? Its not just a single person. You're working within a whole community. I realized though, I can't knock UT off my list. Cause the honest truth is, I'm tired of moving. I've always been tired of it. I want to just stay home. This semester at northeast has shown me how much easier it is for me to pass when i have a home to come to that is stable, well stable as in i have a place to sleep and roof over my head. If things don't go so well on campus, home is a 50.00 bus ride back home (use to be 25...silly ride limits). Yes, they sadly don't have any of the classes i deeply desire, but I can still get those classes at another school. Also at a couple schools, Deaf studies has its own courses. You can go from a certificate to a Masters in it. I'm cool with that. I can also take the classes in the summer. I think its offered in the summer at Woods. To take it during the summer at woods, I need to be fluent in ASL. Spring semester offers it with an interpreter, since the class meets Wood's diversity requirement. (Oh yeah. Woods has Deaf teachers teach on Deaf subjects. Obviously a good idea.)

This UT thing is only an idea. Who knows if it will work or not. The issue I have with state schools is that they maybe cheap but they hurt my ability to have financial aid. I have gone to many colleges and failed because of various situations in my life. I can't say life has been very hard since I was 18, but it hasn't been easy either. Withdrawals and failed classes count towards my "attempted credits". This can cause me to lose financial aid then have to pay for all my classes. Some who have gone to a college then change their major run into this issue. Others may only miss out on a year of school. I have this issue at ETSU, since they counted pretty silly credits like "Telephone techinques" that do not count towards my degree.

We will see how it goes. :D I just want to be able to finish by 35 >.>

Choosing to Lose

Earlier in october, I decided to look into losing weight. I've been researching everything I need to know about not just losing weight but living a healthier lifestyle. There are many who eat foods that are bad for them. They don't gain weight but it builds up to effect their health later in life.

As i stare at myself, I know i started this cause I don't want to become diabetic....at the same time, I remembered before I put on this weight. God things weren't so complicated. This much weight is just annoying. Flabs of skin that annoy you and just meh. Then there's other physical side effects. Never been over weight in my life before I started to gain weight. I know this weight is over a long period of time. I had opportunities to lose it when it was less, but I never took it. Learned my lesson and need to just be reasonable from now on.

God I can't wait to lose the weight. Hoping to go to the gym later.