patterns

I've not been doing things lately i'm suppose to and i was taking notice of something. I know that how i treat myself is how i feel about my life. I notice when I"m in tn, i don't take care of myself. I hide out, don't be clean and become a hermit. When I'm out of here and in mo, yeah i'm a hermit in the way i've always been. Its a good style hermit. i still take care of myself and do my best to take care of myself.

So when i think about this, i just wanna go back. I hate seeing myself like this, but theres nothing I can really do about it right now. I've got business that comes first and the rest has to wait. Especially figuring out how to get ju's left over stuff to mo...may have to take what i can and come back for the rest in oct. Theres really no choice in what I need to do. I should be back in mo by august...not like there's no choice on returning either. haha. Didn't go through the hell of the past year and get into WWU just to sit looking pretty. School starts august 18th.

I'm trying to make the best of moms but its just not home for me. It hink thats a big factor for me. Oh well. we're gonna go see gabby today. Hopefully get my oil changed soon. I'm going to work on paying a few things then head back. Probably will be beginning of angst before i get back cause i sorta want my cell phone to work first ;)

anyway i'm off. thats my thought of the day. Now to be lazy >.>